In this final section of the book Gogol begins dating Moushumi, an Indian family friend from his childhood. Although a relationship with a Bengali girl arranged by his mother is far from what Gogol imagined for himself or from any relationship he has had in the past, Gogol falls in love with Moushumi and they get engaged and married. Maried life begins well for the couple, but they begin to grow more distant as subtle conflicts arrise. When Gogol discovers that his wife has been having an affair, they hastily seperate and divorce.
Many of the conficts between Gogol and Moushumi are caused by her need to be independent, "This assurance is important to her, along with the Sanskrit vows she'd repeated at her wedding, she'd privately vowed that she'd never grow fully dependant on her husband as her mother had" (Lahiri, 247). I don't mean to say that Moushumi wanting independance is a bad thing, actually I think it is a positive quality for her to want to have but her attempts to achieve this are highly questionable. Moushumi chooses to lie to her husband about where she is instead of simply telling him she needs to "remind herself that she was still capable of being on her own" (Lahiri, 247). Moushumi continues to create a life separate from the one she shares with Gogol when she begins to have an affair with a man named Dimitri she met while she was still in high school.
I think another reason for Gogol and Moushumi's failed marriage is that their relationship is stuck in the past. Since their childhoods in which they were some what acquainted, Gogol and Moushumi have both reinvented themselves. Gogol changed his name to "Nikhil", had American girlfriends and built a life independent of his parents his parents. Moushumi moved to Paris, became promiscuous and became friends with pretentious Americans. Gogol and Moushumi's marriage brings them back to the cultural expectations of their parents and back to the past. They end up living a life they never imagined for themselves, Moushumi even tells Gogol that "...he was exactly the sort of person she had sought to avoid" (Lahiri, 212). Even their marriage ceremony itself is planned completely by their parents and is nothing like the wedding ceremony they wanted for themselves.
Through their marriage and after the divorce, Gogol continues to grow more appreciation for his parents and his culture, and as a result he gains a better understanding of who he is as a person. The book ends with Gogol reading the book his father had given him years before, by the author that he was named after. I am glad Gogol finally appreciates his parents in a way he hadn't when he was younger and is able to accept who he is as a person, although it is sad he wasn't able to express this to his father well he was still alive.
I thought this was a good book and I enjoyed reading it. I was able to empathize with Ashoke and Ashima's struggle immigrating to a foreign country and to Gogol growing up with two conflicting cultures even though I have very little of these experiences myself. I hope everyone else enjoyed this book as well.
A traditional Bengali wedding, like Gogol & Moushumi's
I think another reason for Gogol and Moushumi's failed marriage is that their relationship is stuck in the past. Since their childhoods in which they were some what acquainted, Gogol and Moushumi have both reinvented themselves. Gogol changed his name to "Nikhil", had American girlfriends and built a life independent of his parents his parents. Moushumi moved to Paris, became promiscuous and became friends with pretentious Americans. Gogol and Moushumi's marriage brings them back to the cultural expectations of their parents and back to the past. They end up living a life they never imagined for themselves, Moushumi even tells Gogol that "...he was exactly the sort of person she had sought to avoid" (Lahiri, 212). Even their marriage ceremony itself is planned completely by their parents and is nothing like the wedding ceremony they wanted for themselves.
Through their marriage and after the divorce, Gogol continues to grow more appreciation for his parents and his culture, and as a result he gains a better understanding of who he is as a person. The book ends with Gogol reading the book his father had given him years before, by the author that he was named after. I am glad Gogol finally appreciates his parents in a way he hadn't when he was younger and is able to accept who he is as a person, although it is sad he wasn't able to express this to his father well he was still alive.
I thought this was a good book and I enjoyed reading it. I was able to empathize with Ashoke and Ashima's struggle immigrating to a foreign country and to Gogol growing up with two conflicting cultures even though I have very little of these experiences myself. I hope everyone else enjoyed this book as well.
I agree with your statement about them not expecting themselves to marry someone who is Bengali. Their marriage and the person they married is the exact opposite to as what they both wanted in the past. However, I still find it really "childish" in a way that Moushumi cheats on Gogol. As you said, she should've at least told him if she is going to do something like that.
ReplyDeleteGogol reading the book and discovering his identity I find is the only happy part of the ending in this book. I wish there was more exposed in the end but oh well, the end is the end. I also enjoyed this book very much and I'm glad I got to read your blog.